The Influences on Your Money: Who’s Really Controlling Your Wallet?

June 17, 2025

There’s an old saying: “If you hang around nine broke people, you’ll be the tenth.” It may sound harsh, but there’s deep truth there.

The people you surround yourself with, whether friends, family, or coworkers, can have a powerful impact on how you spend, save, and even think about money. Your money mindset doesn’t live in a vacuum; it’s shaped by the people and environments you interact with every day.

My husband recently shared an observation from his job. A new employee had started off bringing home-cooked meals to work daily. She was proud of her discipline and intentional about her spending. But within a few months, he noticed a shift. She began buying lunch more often and posting trendy meals online. The change? She had grown close with a coworker who’s trying to build a following as a TikTok influencer. And somewhere along the way, her values were quietly replaced by someone else’s image driven habits.

This story made me pause and ask myself: What’s drawing from my paycheck without my conscious permission?

I thought back to a season when I had friends who loved going out every weekend. At first, I’d decline to protect my budget. Eventually, the invites slowed down and so did the friendship. Apparently, I was “no fun” and honestly, I was okay with that. I’d rather be “boring” and financially secure than stress over bills for the sake of social approval.

When I did my own money audit, I realized the person I have the biggest financial tug-of-war with is …my mom. She’s incredibly generous and loves to shop for her grandkids, but I’ve had to lovingly say “no” more times than I can count. No, the kids don’t need more clothes. No, I don’t need another new pair of shoes. If I’m not careful, I’ll find myself justifying purchases I never intended to make. That’s why I limit our shopping trips together. I know my financial boundaries, and I protect them.

Here's the truth:

Financial discipline isn’t just about budgeting, it’s about awareness. It’s asking yourself:

• Who’s influencing my spending habits?

• Are these choices aligned with my values, or someone else’s expectations?

• Am I chasing a lifestyle…or building a life?

  
  

There’s nothing wrong with shopping at high-end stores or wanting luxury but only if it truly reflects your goals and your income. Not because you’re trying to impress someone or avoid feeling left out.

Because when the debt collectors call, or the account dips too low, the crowd won’t be there to cover the cost. You will.

So, take a moment today to reflect.

Who’s really influencing your money?

Is it a friend, a parent, a partner, a coworker, or the ever-persistent pressure of social media?

Whatever your answer is, acknowledge it, and if needed, course correct.

Because financial freedom isn’t just about how much you earn it’s about how much control you have over your decisions.

About Petra-Ann Brown

Petra-Ann Brown is the founder of Brown Financial Solutions, LLC, a financial coaching practice that empowers individuals to take control of their financial lives. She is also the host of Island Money 365 podcast, where she shares inspiring immigrant stories and provides invaluable financial resources to the community.